2
STAY AWAY FROM THE RED BUTTON
there are many shapes to intimidation. i have
seen it in the bathroom it was a living room it
was a kitchen it was in the only quiet space under
the pillow it hid under the dust of my suitcases
it lived off the cheese in the refrigerator it was
on the street corner it was in the car it could be
the water in the shower or the lizard on the
windowsill it lived in the wardrobe it chose my
clothes it questioned the click of my shoes on
the pavement it accused the silence when i was
thinking it hid my breasts lowered my eyes bit
my nails dulled my hair and, look – it doesn't
care if you cry or roll up if you get angry or fed
up if you scream or just want one second of peace.
it is an old fbi fire tobacco and fire arm technique –
loud and blaring constant and unexpected – it
will drive anyone mad. before you know it you're
the one standing on the desk with the light in
your own hand. before you know it you're the
one pointing a lit up finger at your own head.
before you know it you're pointing anything at
anyone else. we are not what we think we are. we
are not what we want to be. we are not bridges or
butterflies or chocolate bars or pretty word factories.
we don't belong anywhere near a pta committee or
a red button that makes other things go boom. we
don't belong anywhere near anything that could
turn a light bulb into an interrogation room.
Courtney J. Campbell is from Michigan, but has lived in South America for the last seven years. She's preparing to move back up yonder this year. She's in that weird in-between stage and she's scared, but don't try to hold her - she's been known to bite. You can find more of her poems and essays scattered around here and there as well as on her myspace blog
